Million in One

Nothing makes sense, yet everything makes sense. All the love songs, all the quotes. I was not aware of the butterfly effect until now. I didn’t know why love stories were penned down that way and why is love described as so beautiful. I and my naivety never knew that it is a powerful emotion that was waiting to engulf me into its fold, to welcome me into this beautiful chaos where unwillingly and unconsciously you let all your guard down. The tangled web of insecurities, hurt, and the potential of an uneasy life is not what worries you anymore but you are actually trapped in the colored mess of one single human who happens to be your heartbreakingly-ravishing reality.

A connection that is both twisted intricately and yet so simple to decipher; it makes you go head over heels one minute and cascades warmth within you the other. Nothing happens yet everything happens. You feel like jumping, free falling into the fragments of your own madness, and yet you know you will be safe. Because your person will just break your fall, engulf you. And you will be gliding to the destination of their madness, the colors made for you. Nothing less than beautiful; nothing more breathtaking.

All I think about is him. From my mornings to my nights and everything in between. I know it’s something to say because you do not actually have them. And trust me, it is not entirely essential for your loved ones to be physically around you. They linger in your thoughts. Like he does in mine. I call him my heart because it’s like every beat in me is because of him. I do not want you to think that I am being corny or something. But you see for me life is of an entirely different meaning. For me, life is him. The peace he brings along, the love he offers to me, the care he provides. The happiness he is all about. I know I am trapped. And I promise I have no intention of escaping it whatsoever.

I have always tried to be a good person in everyone’s story. Why is that so? Maybe because I never wanted to be remembered as a person who caused them to hurt? But my love for him defies the principle. I no longer care who I am missing out on as long as I serve him with happiness. Because whatever he feels is reflected in me. And no, I am not a reflection of his soul. But in fact, he was that missing puzzle in my soul and I found him, and he just fit in. That is why whatever he feels is radiated within me. And I have reached a point where when I look at myself, all I see is him. I so wish you could know him the way I do.

Dreaming, living, craving a forever with you.

And that is when I look at him and I cannot help but think; here he is, my million in one.


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